Humpday Hasbeens

This begins our weekly episode of reliving the past and predicting the future. We will look into the lives of former teammates and opponents. These people were once stud athletes and now, no one knows where they are or what they are doing. Hopefully we can catch you up to speed on these guys and maybe, just maybe, YOU will be mentioned. Here is Hasbeen #1...

Andrew Wellendorf

PAST: Andy was a stud in every sport in high school but was never really noticed by his coaches for some strange reason. He rotated in at WR, he drag bunted every AB, and he rarely got playing time in bball till his senior year. He had a few offers to play some basketball and maybe even a few to play football but he decided to walk on at the College of Mt. St. Joseph. It wasn't until his college days where his coaches realized his studness that his career took off. He began dominating the HCAC from game one where he reeled in 2 TD's. He would go on from there to break just about every MSJ receiving record and scoring record in his career. (We won't mention that he also played a year of basketball but was ineligible halfway through the year.) During his last couple of years of football, professional scouts began to take notice of the tall, white, lanky receiver. Colts and Bengals scouts were seen regularly at his games. He was assured of a first round draft pick but somehow went undrafted. He got an invite to the Bengals rookie camp where he burned our beloved Johnathan Joseph many a time. Still, he got cut. He traveled to New York City to tryout for the Giants but once again was cut. He took as many free clothing items as he could from those camps and his dad still wears them to this day. He tried to play some Arena ball but he was still 6'5 and white.

PRESENT/FUTURE: Currently Andy is working at a sweet job where he puts paper in a machine and waits for it to come out the other end. He has gained about 30 pounds from the picture above and struggles to turn down a sandwich. He will be getting married in less than a month to a lovely woman who got suckered into the marriage. Andy tries to dominate sports like he used but he just doesn't have it anymore, it's quite sad really. I think the future bodes well for Andy and his wife. He just got a membership to Urban Active but has rarely been seen there. Andy plans on retiring at age 36, wasting all his money on golf and then getting another job when that money runs out, his wife loves that idea. We wish you well Andrew.

"CHOO CHOO"